Notes from Lapta, Cyprus – Alternatives? by Ken Dunn

When will we ever see a new airline based in the TRNC? Something was supposed to happen in March this year, then April and now September is the next possible date. For myself, and I suspect many others, I do wonder if that will happen. Pigs and wings, as they say. It seem likely that the earliest attempt at providing a new carrier to replace the demise of CTA will be next year and when that will happen is anybody’s guess, if at all.

In the meantime Pegasus, Turkish Airlines and that off-shoot of TA, Anadolu, are the main contenders to fly ‘direct’ to Ercan. Which leaves ‘Squeezyjet’ and the rest, BA et al, to fly from the UK to Larnaca, that well known airport built on Turkish owned land. Oh dear, I shouldn’t have mentioned that, should I? Well, notwithstanding the continuing confusion about the possibility of ever having a replacement for CTA we don’t really have much of a choice, especially regarding the cost of a flight, unless you book ten years in advance.

We’ve tried the ‘Larnaca run’ in the recent past and that was OK, despite the grumpy GC staff at the border. Return journeys were much the same. But all of that has made we wonder what other means of travel to the TRNC might be possible. By road, driving down through Europe can take at least ten days, with luck. It’s a long way! By sea, unless you have your own boat, yacht, or one of those huge, white pointy things floating around in Girne Harbour, it could take weeks.

So, what are the alternatives? Well, here are a couple of examples of how to encourage a new approach, and who knows, we might well be able to emulate. Insects, don’t ask me which ones, can float up into the air and pick up the jet stream, thousands of feet above all of us, whooshing around the northern, and southern, hemisphere, to convey themselves thousands of miles. No luggage limit. There’s a plus!

Birds, of many species, regularly fly north, south, east and west, at all times of the year, depending on the seasons. No passports required. Lucky them. How do they get away with that? We should look into that, shouldn’t we?

So, here’s something the future. First of all there’s ‘Para-sending’. At present it’s a trendy way to jump off to your death from St Hilarion or any other high point of the mountain range! But, if a parachute-ish link could be established with Turkey, depending on a fair wind across the Med, that could be a very cheap way to travel. I’m not sure what the baggage allowance might be but it’s worth a thought.

Then there are the ‘Jet Skis’. At the present time they are a convenient and very efficient way to kill other folk swimming and paddling about close to popular beaches but, if controlled, they could provide a very simple alternative, without having to wait, for the departure of ferries from Girne.

It’s a mere 50 or 60 miles to the coast of Turkey from the TRNC and it would be an asset to use these things, letting them loose, emphasising they should be used at full throttle to as many ‘oiks’ as possible, thereby ensuring drowning a substantial number of them on the pretext of a cheap way home, wouldn’t it?

Until any of that happens we’re stuck with whatever happens regarding ‘direct’ flights to the TRNC and the emergence of a new airline. One does have to say that, ultimately, the Wright Brothers are totally responsible and have given everyone huge and irreconcilable problems, not just here but internationally, than they would ever have believed possible. But then, there is always the final idea of airships, wow, that’s a goodie, isn’t it? Well, no. We all know what happened to the British R101 and the German Hindenberg – Bang!

So. basically, you really can’t win. Just go with the flow and book up as early as you can to fly with whoever you can, this way or that, landing on this or that side of the line and let’s see what happens, if anything, in the months ahead. It’s not just irritating or annoying. It’s really quite sad.

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